Warmest Love For You All,
Hai how are you?? God it’s been a long month for me… Sorry for not directly post here about my trip to the beautiful Lampung with my friends. I got sick for a while, and demand a total bed rest for a week. Maybe I was too tired, but now here I am again, better than before. Better, because you know, after a year having a very low blood plate around 20.000-40.000 top, I finally recovered miraculously, now I have 200.000 blood plate!! I am a normal person now… God, I am so blessed!! It is really liberating, because finally what I wish for granted by His grace. It’s amazing. I thought I’m going to have an abnormality for the rest of my life. But once again, He’s been so kind to me, and listen to all of my prayers. I LOVE YOU LORD!
So my wish for having a normal and healthy blood plate coming true. I am so grateful for that. But honestly there were some plans I had that couldn’t be done as I planned this same month. It bummed me for some days, but now I finally accepted everything.
As one of those people with a super perfectionist character, sometimes it’s hard for me to accept when my plan was shattered. Life has been really generous to me, but at the same time I feel that life is sometime unfair to me. Especially mostly, when I didn’t get things that I plan. At first it was so hard for me to accept that, I easily got stressed and depressed when plan didn’t go well. But in time I learned…
The biggest hit in my life was my husband’s death. It was a disaster… I was that person who loved to plan my daily activity, and imagine this is for our marriage… I had mission and vision with him. We were a very compatible partner and we had lot of plans for our life. But it ended in a year of marriage, leaving me all alone without my partner and our goals will never ever going to happen. I was beyond depressed. Life seemed so cruel to me.
Months after, I finally I moved on… slowly but sure.
I learned to accept life and faith, and really believe that actually there’s nothing given to me I can’t handle. It’s true, because I’m still living well even without my husband and our plans. I started to build my own dream, some are different with my dream with him, and there, I felt alive again. Because I have a new hope and goals. Without them, I felt nothing.
That experience taught me a lot, and that’s one of the reason why I was so calm when accepting my own disease. Nothing given to me I can’t handle. And I believe His plan is the best plan… more than a human’s perfect plan it self. We only know what we want, whether it’s good or bad for us. But He, always know what best for us, and it’s always good in the end… Now I really believe in that, so when somethings didn’t went well according to my plan, I raised faster and started to live again.
Sometimes, He teaches me lesson in the hardest way… to make me finally stop and see that life according to His plan, is always the best plan. Then I refocus my self and energy to the thing that matter, to my purpose in life. To be grateful in every situation. Even hurt-ed, with a graceful heart, in the end what I see that my life is still so beautiful, yet so meaningful. Because it’s so true… A grateful heart is a magnet of miracles. And miracles are my best friends now.
It really happened to me.
So friends, be grateful and happy even you’re in pain… Because if you really mean it, happiness is really going to come in your life.
May you have the most blessed life My Friends.